Today I stepped foot into what would be my last wedding. I shot it with one of my dearest friends, and despite some of the, "crazy events", of the day, it ended with giant string lights, a 90 year old dancing grandfather, and a delish Cold Stone bar. Could have been worse ways to spend a Saturday.
I've been really reflective lately, about where I'm at and where I'm heading - so I was totally taken off guard when a few hours before our start time, I had the most incredible realization.
It came to me as I was listening to Lysa TerKeurst talk about the art of writing. I suddenly saw a plan unfolding. I saw reasons for things I've questioned and fought against and begged for. I began to understand why He never gave me the kind of photography business I thought I wanted. It was all of the sudden clear as day, how often times, in my own life, the Lord has been simply crafting me for something better.
So though we may beg for a yes, He gives us a no. And even in our most stubborn times, if we hear His no but do everything in our power to make it a yes, we then, out of the blue, realize all this time we've been fighting for something we *thought* was great - but was nothing compared to the grand thing He had in store.
Grand guys. Not just great, but grand. I wish I knew what that grand thing was. Perhaps it is Faces of Grief. Maybe it means finishing my memoir. It could be committing to one of my fiction pieces or... something completely unrelated. I have NO clue.
But I'm excited. And I'm open. and I'm not at all going to question any more. Because I feel it in my gut. I know there's a plan for me, and I know it will be grand, if I only listen to my heart and allow the idea room to settle in.
Can not wait, for the day when it all makes sense. When I can jump up and down in glee "OH I SEE NOW!" Until then I'll keep on keeping on. I'll push through the hard stuff, with the knowledge in my pocket that there's a reason for the lot of it. Hope you can find that same peace.