Tea for Two

tea for two // motherhood & grief // angie warren

Dear sweet girl,

Today it was just the two of us at tea.

In my dreams though, the table is full. There are five generations of us 'round it, completing the circle of a tradition started long ago.

In my dreams the sound of cups hitting plates is a chorus, the five of us. There's chit chat, the stirring of spoons, and the pouring of Earl Grey.

In my dreams we're fighting over the cucumber sandwiches, in my dreams Nana hands me the lemon custard even though I know it's her favorite.

In my dreams it wasn't just you and I at tea.

In my dreams the sweet laughter of your great-great grandma is there, her dark hair bouncing around. I think she would have called you "little Miss America", like she did me.

In my dreams your great grandma is beside her, instead of 3000 miles away, in a cabin, in Ohio. She loves you dearly, my girl.

In my dreams Nana is there. She's helping you spread the devonshire cream and taking you potty. She's showing you how to put the napkin on your lap, and savoring every bit of time she has with you.

But the truth of it is, there are only three of the five of us left here on Earth, and today it was just us two.

So while my mind wishes for those beautiful tea parties, and memories I ache to hold - I shall tuck today deep into the pockets of my heart, to unfold and cherish each time I wish for my dreams to return.

Thank you Quinny, for the gift of new beginnings and of doing scary things. They aren't as hard with you by my side.